All I want for Christmas

When it comes to Christmas I have an affliction that means I am at an immediate disadvantage from most people. It is a problem that I fear is untreatable and causes me sleepless nights, night tremors, hot flushes. It is something that I am learning to live with although it is not easy and can be seen as rather anti-social.

Those of us who suffer from this find it embarrassing to talk about it and try to keep it quiet and many of us are still able to live a fairly normal life and to varying degrees of success manage to keep the problem from our loved ones and those who are close to us. It is something that people find hard to talk about which means we suffer in silence, putting on brave faces that belie the turmoil that is going on inside.

After many years of suffering in silence for the first time this year I feel strong enough and confident enough to share this problem and hope that I will not be harshly judged or looked at with pity. Someone needs to confront the issue and make a stand for the countless number of people who share this affliction with me.

Well, I have delayed it for long enough,….I suffer from… presentandgiftitos. This means I am hopeless, nay pathetic at gifts. When someone asks me what I would like for Christmas my mind goes blank, my mouth dries up and I am unable to speak. I know what I would like to say, my mind is working over-time but I just can’t share what is in my head with the person that asks. Fortunately I am not an extreme case as I do enjoy buying gifts for other people even if I struggle thinking of what to buy.

I look in all the shops and trawl through all the gift catalogues and mentally mark all the things I think I might like but at the decisive moment when the question is asked I just cannot bring myself to say anything. You can imagine the frustration that this causes for loved ones.

I think one of the main causes of this affliction is the sufferers thought, “Am I worth that much ?”

A side effect of this affliction which truly does irritate Lynn, is that around about this time of year just as she is struggling to think of what to buy me I go out and buy something that could have been my present ( and before you ask yes I have done it again this year).

The wonderful and awesome thing about Christmas is that each of us can marvel at the fact that we have received a present and gift beyond compare and more precious and valuable that we could ever ask for or ever hope to deserve. The gift of the child in the manger is God’s gift to all mankind. A gift of love, hope and peace. The problem is that it would seem that most of us when it comes to the real meaning and purpose of Christmas suffer from ‘presentandgiftitis’ and cannot believe that it is for us and as a result it remains unclaimed and I venture to suggest that is the main reason why, in contrast to the joyous news of the Angels, there is not at present, “Peace on Earth and Goodwill toward all men”.

Let us make an effort this year in defeating this unseen affliction and enjoy the gift that is given and marvel in the fact that we can receive a gift from God far beyond what we deserve….